The Wish.

The question of the day is: "Do you take life for granted?" Have you ever just stopped and honestly thought about your life and how extremely lucky you are to be alive? Your situation might not be the most fantastic one in the book and lets just face it, life is just hard in general. Nothing ever goes the way you want it to and you just get completely fed up. Ever been there? I have. Life is about choices. I made the choice to marry The Hubster knowing what he does for a living. Yeah, its tough him being gone literally all the time.. and there is that risk he may never come home, but I made the choice to spend the rest of my life with him. The things he does for me, I never take for granted.. not once.

However, there is one thing I did take for granted that I wish I never did. My big sister Alyssa. She was the all star athlete, perfect grades in HS and the person you just flocked to because she was just THAT cool. She had a dark side. Depression and her disease got the best of her. She was diagnosed with bipolarism at 14 years old. None of us siblings really understood what it was. She dropped out of HS, got into drugs, started cutting and burning herself and that stayed with her until she was about 17 or 18 years old. When she decided to turn her life around and became a fire fighter in the Job Corps, our whole entire family just felt immediate relief. She got her GED, she was a certified EMT and she was making it in this tough ass world. I knew she felt awesome about herself which made me want to make her proud and get good grades in school. (She'd reward me with Jamba Juice) I joined AFJROTC in HS to make her proud (she did it too in HS before she dropped out) I was just trying to do everything in my power to make her proud.

Alyssa (my big sister)

August 31st 2005.. I remember like it was yesterday, but I will explain that whole story on a blog that is dedicated to her on August 31st (stay tuned). I took her for granted. I wish I never did. I wish I never said the things I did to her that night. I wish she could come back and tell me what to do with my life. I miss her. I miss her advice. I miss everything about her. Its weird to think I have outlived her and Im her baby sister. Take time out of your day to just be thankful for everything you have. If you believe in the Lord, thank him for the air in your lungs. Be thankful today and don't take your life, family or anything for that matter for granted.

-Cori